6 Signs of Stress

The other day I was panicked because I could not find my car keys. I always place them in the same spot & they were no where to be found. After tearing up my room I realized they were right where I left them earlier in the day. Have you ever had one of these moments? You know the kind of moment where you are looking for your phone only to have it in your hand or your sunglasses only to have them on your head. Please tell me I'm not the only one.  

Everyone is stressed these days. Gov't shutdowns, kids, family, work, money, the list goes on & on. Stress has a nasty way of creeping up on you. Stress can impact the body in very weird & visible ways.

According the AMJH physical symptoms can raise your emotional anxiety even more. For instance, hair loss due to stress, could throw you over the proverbial edge. If you don't break the cycle you can face serious issues such as obesity, depression or heart disease. Doctors suggest the best way to reduce overall stress is to get enough sleep, eat healthy food, exercise, phone a friend & focus on what you can control.  I'm stressed just typing that last sentence. Here are some red flags that your body may be trying to tell your something according to Women's Health:

Stomachaches:

The brain's nervous system is linked to the gut's, so mental stress can wreak havoc on your GI tract, says Bincy Abraham, M.D., a gastroenterologist at Baylor College of Medicine. Depending on your situation, your doctor may treat your tummy troubles with over-the-counter drugs (stool softeners), prescriptions (such as antinausea meds), or dietary changes (fiber can restore your gut's stress-ravaged helpful bacteria).

In the meantime, the best natural remedy for stress-caused constipation, diarrhea, nausea, or vomiting is. . .exercise. It may sound like the last thing you want to do when your stomach is aching, but heading out for a run can boost endorphins that make the mind and gut feel better.

Hair Loss:

Roughly three to six months after a majorly stressful event, like getting axed from a job or ending a big relationship, you might notice more hair on your brush or in the drain than usual (shedding around 100 strands a day is normal). Super-high levels of sex hormones called androgens, which zoom up during stress, could mess with hair follicles to prompt temporary hair loss, says Roberta Sengelmann, M.D., a dermatologist in Santa Barbara, California.

There's no one food or supplement that's proven to restore your locks, but eating a balanced diet can help cell growth and healing.

Eyelid Twitching:

These annoying muscle spasms typically occur around one eye and last for a few minutes. Stress is one of their most common causes, though doctors aren't quite sure why.

When a twitch strikes, close your eyes, try to relax, and breathe deeply. Inhale for four seconds, hold your breath for seven seconds, then exhale for eight seconds. Repeat this four times while using a fingertip to put mild pressure on the lid that's twitching.

Over-the-counter artificial tears can also help ease the spasms, which dry eyes can exacerbate, says Anne Sumers, M.D., of the American Academy of Ophthalmology. If the twitching spreads to other parts of your face, see a physician—it could be a more serious type of spasm.

Stress can short-circuit your immune system, causing dormant skin issues to act up.

Acne:

Just like your hair, your skin is sensitive to those higher-than-normal androgens, which can bring on breakouts, says Sengelmann. Talk to your dermatologist if your zits keep coming back—the chronic inflammation can lead to scarring. (As hard as it is, resist the urge to pop the suckers, which only adds to the inflammation. And you're more likely to end up with scarring when you're stressed and your body's ability to heal isn't at its peak.)

Oral and topical prescription meds, as well as certain soaps, can help unplug pores and wipe out the bacteria that cause acne. Your dermatologist might also suggest you go on birth control, or switch up what you're already on, to balance out your hormones. And be sure to stick to noncomedogenic (i.e., non-pore-clogging) makeup, moisturizers, and sunscreen.

Back Pain:

The hormones your body pumps out when you're stressed produce a fight-or-flight response, which—along with raising your blood pressure and heart rate—tightens up your muscles. "If you're trying to outrun a predator, that's good," says Joanne Borg-Stein, M.D., of Harvard's Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital. "But if it's all the time, that sort of chronic stress response can lead to pain." Plus, muscle aches are par for the course if you're hunched over at your desk all day worrying about deadlines.

Movement is the best remedy, so if your back is in knots, stand up every hour and do some stretches, such as reaching your arms over your head, touching your toes, and rolling your neck and shoulders. Also try to get in a 10- to 15-minute walk around the office or outside once or twice a day.

Rashes:

Stress can bring on mysterious rashes or flare-ups of preexisting conditions. That's because it can throw your immune system—not to mention your skin's defenses—out of whack. When these are lowered, you could become susceptible to rash-causing skin infections caused by staph. On the flip side, if your immunity goes into overdrive, your skin will become more sensitive, making a dormant issue like eczema act up.

In either case, bland emollients, including gentle OTC moisturizers, can help you heal. "If that doesn't help, or if the rash is accompanied by a fever or other flu-like symptoms—chills, sweating—see your doctor right away," advises Sengelmann.

Ya right, I'm going to run when I have diarrhea?! These doctors are stressing me out! Remember to take time for yourself & relax. And if you see me with my eyelid twitching remind me that 4 Kids + Moving = Good Times. I love this vintage add I found about moving,  "Beer Belongs - Enjoy It".

xoxo,

Mrs. Montgomery

Staying Medicated & Happy Like...

Gentleman-In-Training

Do any of you other boy moms ever think about what kind of husband your sons might be someday?
I thought about it a lot over the summer while I was doing ALL of the dishes, ALL of the laundry, and ALL of the straightening up around the house.  I won't claim I did ALL of the cooking, because summer is grill season and I leave that to the Doc.  I wouldn't want to take all of that fun with fire away from him.  Or maybe... I just never learned how to use the grill and the Doc is so darn good at it.
But I digress.
Admittedly, in a moment of anger, I hit the ceiling one day.  I had enough of waiting on these boys hand and foot and decided I was no longer going to be bound by servitude to these young men in my home.  What the heck was I thinking when I cleaned dishes for a 14 and 9 year old boy every day?
It was time to rock that boat.
One month after my meltdown, my boys are still grumbling, but this mama is a whole lot happier. These are things they need to know how to do someday when they are on their own.  It's all about training, right?
And as I started to pat myself on the back while thinking their future wives will love me someday, I had another wake up call.
The date.

I took my 9 year old on a date.  

The Doc took our oldest to the high school football game and let Jacob and I have the Blue Man Group tickets.  Jacob and I would always choose a show over a hot and sweaty football game.
Jacob and I were really excited about our night out.
As we began planning our evening, I realized that I had a long road ahead of me in preparing my little Romeo for his dating future. The following is a list of the good, the bad and the ugly.

Bad - He fussed about having to wear fancy clothes.  Fancy clothes meant a shirt with a color (Underarmour, of course) and khaki pants.  He wanted to wear flip flops with athletic shorts and a t-shirt. Good - He kept telling me that I looked pretty and he loved my hair. Bad - He wanted to take me to McDonald's. Worse - His alternate option for dinner was Taco Bueno. Worst - His third and final dinner offering was Sonic. The Compromise - We ate at Chili's.  I didn't want Chili's but at least it didn't have a drive through. Good - He wanted us to sit on the same side of the booth. Good - Again, he tells me I look pretty and kisses my cheek. (sweet, sweet boy!)

Best - He brings a dollar to buy us a "romantic treat" at the show. Not-So-Good - The "romantic treat" costs $2 and he chooses Skittles, knowing how I detest Skittles. The Ugly - I have plenty of money to cover the Skittles and buy myself a consolation bag of M&Ms.  I ate the whole darn bag by myself in about 5 seconds. Good - Once again, I get to hear how pretty I look.  I'm beginning to believe it less and less and wonder when the next request is coming. (Note to self - Jacob needs to expand his vocabulary a bit)
It looks like I will be having to tell this child that his flattering words will only take him so far.  
I'm so glad I have a little time to set things straight.

My fancy man puts up a rockin' pose with the Blue Man Group band!

All joking and grading system aside, an evening with my 9 year old is always a highlight. Always. Let the training begin!

Mrs. Priss
Feeling pretty... oh, so pretty... like


(Name that musical!)

Who's Yer Mama?

I was thinking back on some sweet childhood memories recently.  I was thinking about who different individuals in my family were to me as a child versus the relationship we have now that I am an adult.  As a child, some relatives valued me more than others.  I'm not saying they didn't love me, I am saying some embrace your childishness more than others.  Some relatives just prefer to spend time with a more mature crowd.  Hopefully this makes sense. It was at this time that I switched my thinking around a bit.

When my children grow up, how will they remember me?
There is a fine line between teaching your children and nagging them.  Will they think I was a nag because of the many times I have lost patience over a messy room?  Will they wish their mother had played with them more?  Will they tell me I made casseroles just to make them miserable? I seriously don't think they will thank me for their clean rooms or forcing them to do their homework. I am going to be very honest.  While there are many things I could improve on, I am going to focus on one.  I have noticed that my ability to be patient has been strained and I am starting to yell more.  I hate that.  Patience used to be one of my biggest virtues.  I have decided I am going to change back to the old me.  

I attended a conference recently about approaching difficult conversations.  The workshop was intended to teach us how to better communicate with schools for our child with special needs.  There were so many things in that workshop that can apply to your own personal, everyday life.  One thing stuck with me in a big way and I have decided to make that my own goal.  Want to hear it?   Here we go.
Decide WHO you are going to be in every conversation and commit to BE that person. It is very simple, really.  Am I going to be the crazy, angry, middle-aged woman or the mom who can get things accomplished with love, patience, kindness and gentleness?  At the end of the day, both types can achieve the same goal but only one fills their children's hearts with the right stuff.  Only one will grow the type of person that I wish my children to become.  

Who we are is a choice we make.  We can blame past experience, upbringing, genetics, lack of sleep, health, hunger, or present situations but we always have the power to choose how we respond to them. 

For me, I know my faith will bring me through it.  I can pray for the fruit of the spirit and intentionally think things through before I lose my head over the little things in life.  I can plan ahead and prepare for situations.  I can think through positive reinforcements to get the behaviors I want from my children.  I can prepare myself to deal with the meltdown that will ensue from natural consequences that my children will not like.  I know that preparation is the key.  It isn't about being a pushover, it is about being the mother and woman God calls me to be.
So, when you think about it - how will the people in your life remember you someday?

Mrs. Priss

Loving on my kids like...

Free Baby, Family, Parenting Classes at Babies R Us

Did you know your local Babies R Us offers free classes for soon to be parents, new parents & any parent in between. I just learned about these classes. While I am long past the new parent stage some of the workshops offered sound great. Here is one class description:

Medicated vs. Natural Childbirth

Do you have a deep desire to achieve a natural, unmedicated childbirth but are frightened by the notion of childbirth pain?  

Are you suspicious of childbirth programs that promise "pain free" childbirth? 

Come learn the facts of medicated vs. natural birth from the experts, Marlita Camacho & Jenni Anthamatten

Presented by:

Babies R Us & Mama Bird’s Classroom

Redbud Baby Planners and Babies"R"Us are partnering to host a 

drive for the Infant Crisis Services "Help Another Mother" Drive. 

Click here to see full details on our website:

 http://redbudbabyplanners.com/events/

They also offer CPR & Choking/Infant Safety, Baby Basics, Baby Wearing, Crunchy Granola Mama's & more. It kinda makes me want to have another baby. Notice I said, "kinda". {slang term for kind of or not really} Both Oklahoma Babies R Us locations offer these classes, Tulsa & OKC. The RHOK will be looking into partnering with BRU for a fun mom event in the near future. Let us know what you kind of event you would enjoy. Be sure to contact your local Babies R Us for more information on the free classes they offer.

xoxo- Mrs. Montgomery Not Have a Baby Like...

School Lunch Ideas

If you clicked on this post thinking I was going to offer up some great lunch ideas, you have come to the wrong place.  If you want to commiserate with another parent about your child's horrible eating habits, you have arrived.
I have the worst time making a lunch for Jacob to take to school. He is Picky McPickerson when it comes to food.  The child doesn't even like peanut butter or any form of a sandwich - the staple of my own personal school lunches.  No lunch meat for this kid.
I make him eat in the cafeteria as many days as I can.  He is more likely to get a little bit of protein that way. But then there are the days when the cafeteria serves... sandwiches.  And other ghastly foods.  
I've been sending this.

Yup.  Whole grain peanut butter crackers. It's the one peanut butter this child of mine will eat and I'm pretty sure it isn't really peanut butter. It may say "whole grain" but it isn't really good for him.
I put this in his lunch with an apple and some chips. I am a HORRIBLE mother.
I'm seriously out of ideas so I googled for some new ideas.  I did not see one thing I thought my child would eat.  In fact, I found some sights with school lunches that had stuff that not even I would eat.    Surely I am not the only one who has this problem packing a lunch.  Right?  RIGHT?!!
I did come across one site with some good ideas for those of you with normal kids who might eat normal food: http://www.school-lunch-ideas.com/
Things are going to change around here.  I may go with the eat it or starve method.
I really want to know -  What's in your kiddo's lunchbox?


~ Mrs. Priss

Planning a lunch box revolution like...

Good Morning, Sunshine!

I am not a morning person. I have never been a morning person. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say something radical. I'm never going to be a morning person.
Middle school has been a real awakening, if you will.  It starts incredibly early.  We wake at 6 a.m. every weekday morning to be sure to make the bus.   A certain red-head in my family has decided to hate mornings. He refused my requests to set his alarm.
It started with some complaining, then this appeared on his door one morning.

It was dark and I didn't see it.  Upon wakening the boy, he referred me to the sign on his door. Believe me, he got up anyway.
He came home to this.

And quickly amended to this.

"Do not ignore the sign above this one!
*even if you can't read"

Game on, my boy.   Game on.
And there's this chalkboard painted onto the wall outside the boys rooms...

He thought he found a loophole...

Of course I just removed the paper. You probably guessed that.
Victory was mine and Michael admitted defeat.
But the real solution is this.  I am no longer a human alarm clock.  I informed the crazed red-headed boy that he would be waking himself up in the mornings from now on.
There was wailing and gnashing of teeth. He said it wasn't going to happen.
I just smiled sweetly and said that I would be happy to wake him up for school every morning.  It would only cost a dollar per day.  He thought I wouldn't make him pay.  I gave him another big smile and walked away.
I haven't needed to collect that dollar yet.
First they ignore you,  then they laugh at you,  then they fight you,  then you win. ~ Mahatma Gandhi



Mrs. Priss

Working for a dollar like...

Back To School Portfolios

I hate to repeat myself, but... the kids are back in school.   The housewives have been posting about it A LOT here and on their personal Facebook pages.
What you haven't heard yet is how my son, Michael, feels about it.   He is super duper pumped about this school thing. 

Off to school!

Or is he.

Who actually counts school days? This kid does.
Michael has constant thoughts about the free time he loses during the school year. I have constant thoughts about the transition for him and how his teachers will handle him.
There's a whole lotta worrying going on in Prissville.
When you have a child with special needs (Michael has Asperger's Syndrome), you get to meet with the teachers a whole, whole lot.  Teachers love to sit in meetings and do paperwork.  Or not.  As it turns out, teachers are great talkers and not typically great listeners.  I used to teach school and know this to be true.  We tend to be social butterflies.  
About five years ago, I decided to get creative with how I introduced Michael to his teachers.  I make a newsletter portfolio for him!  This provides teachers with a way to save the time they need to set up their classrooms and gives them a visual snapshot of my special kiddo.  It's a win-win.
I'm not going to give you a copy of Michael's portfolio, but I am going to tell you how I make one.
If you don't have a word processing system or something like Publisher, then you need to know that there are resources online.  You don't have to buy anything!  When I searched, I found out that Google Docs has a free newsletter template available here.  There are other options I found here.  Of course you can always email information to the teachers, but I find it better to have something already printed and waiting in their teacher mailbox or handed out by the special education teacher (if this applies).  It will have to go in their file, you see.
The tough part comes next. What to include?
Since your child is the most amazing kid that ever entered the building, you will have a hard time limiting yourself to one page.  Do it anyway.  Would you read a 5 page essay on someone else's child?  I think not. When possible, use direct language and even use bullets.  People like things quick and to the point!
Michael's Portfolio always includes:

• An adorable picture of my handsome son (sized according to whatever space I have)
• Contact information in order of priority (me first, then the Doc since he's at work)
• A little bit about the early years (if needed)
• A few of Michael's strengths (he is kind, he's good at math)
• What we do for him at home (therapy we try, extracurricular activities)
• Areas Michael will need help (organization, communication between parents and teachers)
• Our expectations for him this year & beyond 
• I always, always remind them that they play a significant part in Michael's young life that will help shape who he will be. Show some appreciation in advance!

You don't have a special needs child? So what!  Any child can benefit from a portfolio/newsletter.  Teachers like insight into their students and this is a great way to open up communication between parents and teachers.  You can always add pictures if you don't have a lot of information to share.  Decide what is important to your family and your child and put it on paper.
Even this cute little guy gets a portfolio these days!

Guess his favorite superhero!

Mrs. Priss Helping prepare the teachers for my darlin' like...

I'm also posting this over at the Asperger Mom Network today.  If you know any moms who have a child with Asperger's send them on over!

The Fairy Tale Life of a Housewife

Dear Seven-Year-Old Priss,
Little do you know that someday most of your dreams will come true.  Your dreams at this age are quite simple, really.  Grow up, fall in love, get married, have kids - that sums it up.  
When you get a little bit older you will be afraid to admit that these things are really all you want in life.  People might think you have no ambition!  Sure, you'd like to be a veterinarian... or an occupational therapist... or (gasp) a school teacher.  But ultimately, you wanted the glamorous life of being a housewife with a houseful of kids.
At this point your mind hasn't been warped by Sixteen Candles and the thought that Jake Ryan might be pining for you.  (And why wouldn't he, huh?)  Your knight in shining armor will arrive in a more subtle way.  He will sneak up on you by way of friendship first.  And you'll be glad.  Already you are running away from boys instead of to them.  Relax and know you will eventually find one who makes you want to stay.
Sometimes you will need to remind yourself of how blessed you really are.   This is the life you wanted.   This is the life God has blessed you with.  
Sometimes you will wonder why you wanted to be a professional maid.  Your job will become tedious and you will be tired of cleaning up after every single living thing in your house.  It is unfortunate that rodents and birds do not swoop in and clean your house while you sing your good morning songs.  Cinderella and Snow White tricked you. 
You think your family would happily devour every meal you cook for them.  And why wouldn't they?  You will have amazing recipes and foods that you crave - but you will never make these since you are the only one who will eat them. You will become a short order chef and wonder why you bothered learning to cook. You will never be able to compete with the high quality McDonald's has to offer.
You can't wait to join your kids' school PTA and be the President. With one glance, you will quickly change your mind and volunteer in their teachers' classrooms instead.  In fact, you will find many other things to be passionate about to volunteer your time with.  And you will volunteer with gusto!
The list goes on and on as you live the dream. Your mom forgot to tell you that working for free can sometimes leave you feeling a bit drained and under-appreciated.

What Happened to Snow White?

You will have moments when you wonder why in the world you ever wanted to be a housewife.
When you feel this way, just look at the faces around you and it won't take you long to smile.   It may not be exactly the way you picture it, but this is your very own real life fairy tale. Your dreams really will come true.
Love, Middle-Aged Priss


Mrs. Priss -

who thinks it's time the kids learn to clean their own toilets.

Sassy

My grandmother used to get mad at me and call me "Sassy."  And I didn't like it.
I've decided "Sassy" suits me quite well these days.And I do like it.
Funny how that happens.
What goes around comes around, though.  I now have a thirteen year old boy living in my house.  The sassy factor has been growing and developing since around the age of nine.  I know you're going to say your kids were born this way, but mine wasn't.  I think it's his Asperger's that kept it at bay for so long.
In trying to teach this gangly pubescent boy a thing or two, I employ my best friend - Sarcasm.  Michael and I are both good friends with Sarcasm.  
A few days ago, Michael knocked over a plastic pitcher from the drying rack by the sink.  He kept walking and was ignorant of the fact that he was slowly destroying my kitchen.  This is a common occurrence in a house of boys.
I decided to capture this teachable moment in a way only I would do.  
Priss: "When I knock something over, I pick it up!"(Insert grand gesture where I pick up the pitcher in an exaggerated manner and place it on the drying rack with a huge forced grin on my face)
He does not miss a beat.  With an expression that only a teen could give, Michael immediately responds: "Glad I'm not you."
I laugh.He laughs.
I'm so glad we are able to communicate so efficiently.

Mrs. Priss

with a wee bit of sass.