Sup, Girl?

Mrs. Albright and I love to go out dancing.  We love the night life.  We love to boogie.  We love to get out and show the world just how silly we are. I'm sure we should be embarrassed.   See?

There is never a dull night on the dance floor.

This is an absolute truth.

Most of the places in our city that have live music also have a lot of men on the prowl.  We have discovered that the pick up lines and moves have not changed so much over the years.  It brings me back to one of the first days in college on the dance floor when I was asked the old standby, "Hey baby - what's your sign?"

I am seriously amazed by the menfolk who try these lines.  But then it begs the question -- do these lines actually work?  Wise up ladies!  Somehow, someway these must have worked for them once or they wouldn't use them again.

This past weekend was no exception.  

Best line ever was asked while the band played "Jessie's Girl" who asked... (drum roll)... (tell me you don't see this one coming)... 

"Your husband's name isn't JESSIE, is it?"

Geez.

But there is just one thing I don't really understand.

Maybe you can answer this for me.

Why are the men using these lines on middle-aged, married women out for a girls' night out?

Mrs. Priss

Who just loves to dance like...

Do You Know If This Hotel Is Pager Friendly?

If you follow us on Facebook, then you are probably aware of the fact that Mrs. Albright and I took a trip to Vegas with one of my high school girlfriends.  No husbands.  No kids.  Heck yeah!
It was crazy fun. I would tell you all about it, but then I'd have to kill you.
If I didn't leave a bit of mystery, it wouldn't hold all the magic of Vegas, right? I will tell you this - the last time I slept this little was when I had a newborn.
We did manage to get this one very tame picture by a fountain at the Venetian.

We posed for funny pictures.

I won free shots for Mrs. Albright by answering TV theme song trivia.

We made lots of new friends.

Meet the California girls! 

We danced.

And danced.

And danced some more.

We took pictures of people crazier than us.

(We might appear in a few people's videos as well)

I saw one of my favorite bands.

My husband is a tad bit embarrassed that this guy knows me when we visit Vegas.

And I even sang karaoke with another band friend.

* I'm a groupie *

Bohemian Rhapsody, if you must know.

I would show you the hilarious video, but he says if I share it I would be killing his career.

I'm sure he is referring to his performance, not mine.

Mrs. Albright will be posting more about our trip later this week. If she doesn't mention a need for a babysitter, then she is lying. I can't wait to head back to Vegas with these girls next July!

Mrs. Priss
Doing Vegas properly like...

We Went Out Last (Friday) Night.

Seems like every time I get out I'm in the middle of a Kenny Chesney video.  There is a whole lot of weirdness going on out there.   And I love it.

Mrs. Albright, Mrs. Montgomery and I headed out with a gaggle of girlfriends to listen to one of our favorite bands and do a little boogie-ing.  I won't lie and pretend I wasn't looking for something to report.  As far as I am concerned, we found success. Here's a little recap. You just can't make this stuff up. 1.  I learned that Mrs. Montgomery likes the macho, gangsta look.  I personally thought the Beastie Boys pulled it off but it has been unpopular ever since.  Before you go thinking a married woman was chasing down young men on the dance floor, don't.  She was scoping out for a few of the single ladies with us. 2. I would like to personally thank the woman who followed me to the bathroom to ask my age.  Because of the language barrier it took some time to figure out what she wanted.  Alas, I am not up for entertaining her 20-something year old cousin who is coming to town soon.   True story. 3. If you have a stain on the crotch of your pants, please stand in front of the bathroom dryer until it goes away or go home and change.  If you do not, you will be have a new name - Captain Peepants.   4. If you are a true friend, you will NOT abandon your girlfriend on the dance floor with Captain Peepants.  It was a mass exodus.  I turned around and they were running.   Joke is on them because they missed some of the best dance floor laughs, including #10 on the list. 5. I do not understand these youngsters and their dance floor grinding trains.  It is wrong on so many levels.   Just say no. 6. The dance floor is a safety zone from all the wrongs in the world.  No fighting, please.  This is our happy place.

7. If I'm not at Chippendale's (and I'm never there), then I am not looking for a lap dance.  Same goes for Mrs. Albright who was offered one and never given the chance to say, "No, thank you."   8. If you are 50+ -- you are to old to offer up that lap dance.  I don't care how good you are at dancing or if you work out at the gym every day.   (Side note: that pillar by the dance floor is not a dancing pole) 9. I am in my 40s.  Why, oh WHY, would any 20-something think I need his full attention?  Just because I'm dancing doesn't make me a cougar.  And he already noted the wedding ring.  I've renamed Captain Peepants to YoYo.  He goes away, but he kept returning. 10. If someone rubs their butt against yours on the dance floor, you should always turn around and see who it is.  ALWAYS.  Guess what, Peepants/YoYo?  That wasn't me.  It was gracious of you to thank me for it, though.  If you had bothered to look, you would have seen a skinny 60-something white man shaking it for you. Does this sound like your average night out? Maybe you go to the wrong places. Or is that me?

*Mrs. Priss*



...who likes to get out and boogie.